Growing up is about becoming more and more independent from your parents.
Sometimes this is hard for parents, and they treat their children like, well, children no matter how old they are.
In today’s story, one young lady is old enough to help pay the mortgage on a condo she co-owns with her parents, yet her parents are critical of everything she does.
She’s wondering if she’s the one in the wrong.
Let’s see how the story plays out…
I’ve been through a lot lately within the past year.
I graduated college, got a job. And… I got a house.
Well, sorta.
My parents and I got one together and I pay a part of the mortgage.
Her mother drops in every weekend.
It’s been a dream for my mother to have a house in the city for her on weekends because she comes down for rehearsals and because she wants all her kids together in one place.
The condo has been a huge source of stress on me, because I’ve dealt with my mother coming down every weekend and finding things to criticize me over (like how much of a ‘slob’ I am because I left one hair in the tub, etc.).
I don’t actively trash the place either, I clean up after myself, etc.
Mom isn’t happy that her daughter has a credit card.
She’s also been mad at me because I opened up my own account and got my own credit card at age 23.
But I also did this because last fall, she texted me at work (23 times in one day!) asking me what each transaction was for in an old joint account, and even yelled at me when I donated to my little brother’s charity run back in October.
She was upset that I go out occasionally with friends, or eat out at times.
I’ve paid all my bills on time and have not blown money off on anything like drugs.
She told me ‘that’s not your money to spend!’
It’s not just Mom that’s critical. It’s both parents.
My parents come down and spend the weekend every weekend because they want to refurbish the condo.
Over the weekend, in the condo, I was greeted by yelling because the floor wasn’t swept and because I am being ‘deceptive’ with the card business.
Then yell at me about how ‘I will never make it’.
On Saturday night, this happened.
Her parents acted like they were guests.
I got so overwhelmed and tired of the yelling, that I had to lock myself in my room.
Then she continued to yell at me and ‘be a good hostess and make us dinner’.
They just ordered pizza for themselves, then my parents went out.
Mom was still critical.
When they told me to come downstairs to watch my 11 year old brother, my mother told me to ‘think about my attitude’.
I was fed up still, that I just told her to ‘go’.
And she got angry, and eventually my dad got her to leave.
She wonders if she was in the wrong.
I’m pretty hurt from this weekend.
I’m actually spending the night at a friend’s place, bc the condo does not feel like a home for me.
But AITA for not coming down to cook dinner after all her yelling and controlling behavior towards me?
At 23, she needs her own place, not a place she shares with her parents.
She needs her parents to buy her out for her share of the condo and move somewhere else.
Let’s see how Reddit reacted.
She needs to get her own place.
This reader agrees that she needs to move.
Seriously, she needs to buy a home that is really her own home.
What she does next depends if she’s on the deed or not.
I hope she’s not on the deed.
Then she can just stopping paying and move out.
If you thought that was an interesting story, check this one out about a man who created a points system for his inheritance, and a family friend ends up getting almost all of it.
