When you live abroad, the holiday season can feel very different to back home.
Take the people in this story: they’re living in Italy and trying to recreate the perfect Thanksgiving dinner, without all of the conveniences found in the US.
So when one expat found out that their friend had mastered the perfect recreation of a Thanksgiving dinner, it’s only natural that she wanted a piece of it too.
But with all these other people involved, the situation became too much to handle.
Read on to find out how it all went down.
I (a 54-year-old woman) have been invited by a friend who I will call Ann (50), to come to her house for Thanksgiving.
We all live in Italy, but spent many years in the USA, and have several American friends in the area.
Ann heard that I make a traditional Thanksgiving dinner at my house every year for my family and a couple of friends (six people total).
Read on as the drama begins.
It is quite difficult to get all of the supplies here (no buying canned pumpkin, or cranberry sauce!), so I make every single thing from scratch.
Over the years, I’ve also acquired all the dishes and tools and spices.
I know suppliers for the more exotic things, and am an all around good cook.
So Ann, who was born in China but lived in the USA for 20+ years, asked if I would come to her beautiful (and much bigger) home, and “teach her” how to make the whole dinner for a group of 12 people instead of my usual six.
I was hesitant at first, because we live a very modest lifestyle, and Ann and her (British) husband are very well off.
But I figured it would still be fun, and I would enjoy putting on the feast for new people and in a beautiful kitchen.
Let’s see how this situation panned out.
After I agreed, the problems began.
First, Ann wanted to have the dinner on a day that isn’t Thanksgiving, to make it more convenient.
I decided it wasn’t all that important, since we live in Italy.
So it is scheduled for the Sunday prior to the actual day.
Then when we were planning to meet to go shopping for all the ingredients, she asked if I could do all the shopping and she would “reimburse me for her half”.
I asked what she meant, and she said that I’d be paying for half of everything.
So not only would I be doing all the shopping, all the planning, all the cooking and teaching her as well, but now I’m expected to pay for the food?
Yikes! Let’s find out what this woman said to that.
I told her I could not do this (we really don’t have the budget!) so now she’s trying to alter the menu she agreed to turkey and fixings, candied yams, roasted veggies, an appetizer, and pie.
Really, this a modest dinner by American standards.
She then made a comment that “her” friends don’t “eat like pigs”.
She then went to another guest with my recipes and asked her to prepare my pumpkin pie so she didn’t have to buy the ingredients.
Uh-oh. Read on to see what happened next.
Bear in mind, Ann and her husband are very wealthy.
I’d estimate the whole dinner for 12 might cost €200 for the ingredients, and my labor Ann gets for free.
She thinks I’m being “stubborn and ungenerous,” but my family thinks Ann is taking advantage of my kindness and her miserly ways are ridiculous, since she’d spend double that amount for lunch out on a whim.
My family wants me to just bow out and tell her I’m not comfortable with her attitude.
I’m tempted, because this feels toxic and manipulative.
AITA?
Honestly, Ann sounds like an entitled piece of work.
It sounds like she’s taking complete advantage of her friend’s kindness and generosity.
Let’s see how Reddit reacted to this.
This person agreed that Ann was asking for help, but taking all the credit.
While others encouraged the woman to reconsider their ‘friendship’.
It’s clear that the only person with this woman’s best interests at heart are her family.
And others had strong words for Ann.
They are right, this is a truly toxic relationship.
One thing is clear: this woman needs better friends than Ann.
If you thought that was an interesting story, check out what happened when a family gave their in-laws a free place to stay in exchange for babysitting, but things changed when they don’t hold up their end of the bargain.
