I get it that it can be hard to be around messes in your home if you have OCD.
But if you live with other people, you might have to find a way to survive with a crumb or misplaced item every once in awhile.
In today’s story, a woman who shares a house with several other people is super annoyed at the housemate with OCD.
She finds his complaints and requests completely unreasonable.
Let’s see what she’s dealing with and what she’s thinking about doing about it…
My partner and I moved into a house-share with two others: M (19) and M (25+).
I’m generally tidy and have house-shared for years, but M (19) has been overly strict and passive-aggressive since we moved in.
When we arrived, he tried to give us just one cupboard and one fridge shelf (out of six cupboards and five shelves) for both of us.
When we pushed back, he got annoyed.
Eventually, we took space for ourselves, but he retaliated by throwing away communal items, which might lead to extra charges for all of us.
M (19) takes nitpicking to the extreme!
The house is spotless, yet M (19) constantly complains.
Examples:
• I can’t leave wet sponges in the sink and they have to be in my cupboard despite the damp smell.
• I’m not allowed to use the drying rack for plates.
• I can’t leave leftovers in the kitchen but also can’t have more fridge space. He suggested storing food in my room, which I refused.
• He complained about a bin being half full while we were out for two days, yet refused to empty it himself.
• Once, he sent a long rant about a single crumb in the kitchen.
She seriously can’t handle this nonsense anymore!
His messages are long-winded and often feel targeted toward me and my partner, even though M (25+) is messier.
I finally snapped and told him to adjust his tone.
He claimed these rules are due to his OCD, but they’re excessive, and I’m tired of being hounded.
We’ve tried to accommodate: no personal belongings in communal areas, no guests, and keeping everything spotless.
Still, the constant messaging and lack of compromise are exhausting.
Here’s what she’s thinking about telling him…
WIBTA if I told him:
“Hey, I’ve tried to be accommodating, but your constant passive-aggressiveness and strict rules are becoming ridiculous.
Our home is very clean, and it’s unfortunate if it doesn’t meet your standards due to your OCD.
However, you can’t expect the rest of us to cater to your every need, especially when it comes to communal space.
When you sign up for a houseshare, compromise is necessary.
I also feel the way you address me but not my partner or M (25+) is sexist and domineering, which I don’t appreciate.
Let’s work toward a middle ground.”
I think I’d look for another place to live.
Let’s see how Reddit reacted…
This is a good point…
Does he have a therapist?
This reader is glad he’s not in her position.
Here’s what should really be happening with the dish sponge…
The 19-year-old is acting entitled.
I’d move out and find a way to warn potential housemates!
This guy might have to live alone.
If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.