There’s no doubt in the fact that relationships really do suffer when partners refuse to come to a middle ground for each other.
This guy struggled with making his partner understand how he didn’t want another dog.
Find out how things got bad between them.
My partner (30nb, they/he) and I (32m), have been together almost 10 years. We have a kid who’s almost 10 and a 4 year old dog.
They have faced a lot of things together…
-My partner is disabled so struggles to work and had multiple breakdowns the last time they had a stable job. They currently do freelance work and also have a career goal that is currently expensive and most likely costing us money.
-We bought a house when we thought my partner could still work. Multiple things in the house need work, some sooner rather than later, but we haven’t been able to do any of it.
-We’re behind or struggling with most of our bills.
He’s doing slightly better than the partner…
-I have a steady, decently well-paying job where I work from home. (I’m terrified that’s going to change with the upcoming political situation, but nothing’s confirmed.)
-Our dog is one that they brought home as a puppy as a “surprise” to me after we had to give up the dog that I loved.
–We lost that dog he got into a fight with a neighbor’s dog that I tried to help break up. Both dogs were hurt, and so was the owner of the other dog. My partner knows that I’m not over that, have flashbacks still, and have never wanted to have two dogs in the house since.
He’s headstrong on not wanting the dog.
–This is something they did “for me” despite me telling them at the time that I didn’t want another dog, and certainly didn’t want a certain type of dog. She is all of the things I didn’t want.
She has health issues that mean she has to be on a prescription diet that’s incredibly expensive, and we haven’t been able to follow up on her problems because of how expensive the vet is.
–Until I made it A Problem, I was doing most of the work to care for her. She’s still not getting the care I think she needs (brushing, nail trims) regularly.
Things have been really rough for them…
-We both have mental health problems, trauma, etc. They’re getting therapy and medication, and support me doing the same, but I can’t bring myself to justify the expense.
-They’ve recently lost a lot, and they have had multiple breakdowns. It’s also a really bad time of year for them.
This is where it gets really bad!
Now, for what’s got me posting: they’re bringing home another dog today. It’s some kind of small dog. I’ve been shutting down or dissociating when they talk about it so I don’t have a lot of details.
I’ve told them I don’t want this dog, I’ve told them why. I even tried telling them what I needed in order to feel ok about us getting another dog.
This all lead to the breakdowns I mentioned before, and some help with our current dog.
Things never got better…
Ultimately, I knew that a dog was happening if I wanted it or not, and it was just going to come down to how many people in their family and our friends hated me before then.
Everyone keeps talking about how they should have another dog and how great it would be. Apparently even their counselor said getting this dog would be therapeutic.
So I’m thinking about leaving for a few days to stay somewhere else while they introduce the two dogs. It would just be them needing to take care of the two dogs – but that will probably be really physically tough on them. WIBTA?
UH OH…
That sounds like a lot of trouble!
Why can’t the two find a common ground to agree on?
Let’s find out what folks on Reddit think about this story!
This user states what they would have done if they were in this guy’s shoes.
That’s right! This user knows that getting a pet you can’t take care of is a bad idea.
Exactly! This user blames the partner for disregarding this guy’s feelings.
This user suggests parting ways!
This user thinks the partner is a bad person for triggering old traumas.
People… pay attention to your partners!
If you liked that post, check out this story about a guy who was forced to sleep on the couch at his wife’s family’s house, so he went to a hotel instead.
