A young soon-to-be mom finds herself in a bizarre power struggle with her own mother.
What started as a legacy of wealth from a grandmother’s trust has spiraled into a demand to give her unborn son the maternal last name—or else.
Now, it’s “my name, my money, my rules,” and the drama is heating up.
Hi reddit, I’m a 21F who’s expecting my first child with my partner of almost 8 years (20M). Our son is due in less than 2 months. For this story to make sense, it requires some backstory.
My father isn’t in the picture, so my immediate family is me, my mother and my twin. About 3 years ago my maternal grandmother died. I didn’t have a relationship with her and neither did my mum due to them always fighting.
My grandma was quite wealthy and when she passed away she left me and my twin half a million total in a trust that we couldn’t access until we were 25. She left my mother nothing.
Grandma lett the grandkids with the mic drop of all inheritance moves. Got it.
My mother got a lawyer and got money released early from that trust with the condition that me and my twin gave her half of our inheritance each. If we hadn’t agreed to give her anything, she would of gotten NOTHING.
Our mum then convinced us to put all the money into a trust of her own for our family exclusively for education and housing, saying it would build stability for future generations. I used this money to get a house that me and my partner currently live in.
Since my mum found out I was pregnant, she’s been very pushy that we use her last name (which is currently my last name). It’s a traditional Scottish name with a capital letter in the middle and a lot of use of the letters ‘M’ and ‘N’. I dont like this last name, its hard to pronounce from just reading. I also fully intend to take my partners last name in the future.
Guess the trust wasn’t enough.
Three months ago I told her we wouldn’t be using her last name and would be using just my partners last name. This set her off, calling me petty and ungrateful.
I apologised for upsetting her and asked if we could have a conversation about it so I could understand why it upset her. I expressed that I love her and I don’t want her to be upset. She refused, saying it was my child and I could do what I wanted. I assumed she had come to terms with it and moved on.
Fast forward to last week.
I got a text from my mum saying the following: “By the way, I’ve made changes to the trust. [Her last name] needs to be your child’s surname if you want him to benefit from the trust. I haven’t worked this hard for the future to support a [partners last name]. Thats just the way it is. My last name or bust. I’d rather take the lot and spend it.”
Mom’s new family motto: My name, my money, my rules.
This upset me. I asked her to give me some time and space to think about what she’s done. She then went off at me about how her hard work wouldn’t be wasted (even though she herself said it would be set up for future generations like my kids).
She wouldn’t even have any money to blackmail me with if I hadn’t agreed to give her half of my inheritance after her own mother screwed her over.
I have gone no contact. But I’m starting to wonder if I’m the asshole for not just using her name to keep her happy in order to make sure my son gets access to that money. I dont want him to miss out just because his grandmother is an entitled piece of work.
So reddit, AITA?
When inheritance drama turns into a baby name standoff, it’s safe to say things have gone off the rails.
Redditors are pulling out their popcorn—and their opinions.
This person demands she doesn’t let her mom win.
This person says a solicitor needs to get involved.
This person also has some good advice on where to go from here.
Baby names don’t usually come with terms and conditions, but here we are…
If you liked that story, read this one about grandparents who set up a college fund for their grandkid because his parents won’t, but then his parents want to use the money to cover sibling’s medical expenses.
